Mum telephoned the office as she had spoken to the social prescriber attached to her GP surgery. She had explained how she was feeling and was informed about our Cook & Eat sessions we were delivering. Mum presented with low self-esteem and had a low opinion of herself as a parent to her children.
Mum disclosed that she had a very strict childhood. Her parents did not provide the life skills needed in bringing up a young family and being a positive parent. Mum’s parents insisted there should always be strict rules set and adhered to. Meals were processed microwave meals and mum was not given the opportunity to learn to cook.
The children’s father was brought up in a family which encouraged healthy eating and a varied diet and put pressure on mum to live up to their expectations which she found difficult to do.
From childhood mum’s confidence had deteriorated to the point she felt she was a bad mother. This often takes quite some time to break down. It involves a lot of listening, empathy, and encouragement to help someone believe in themselves. This work will need to continue to ensure that mum remains a confident parent.
Throughout the Cook & Eat sessions we identified that mum was struggling. She enjoyed the weekly sessions and was learning a lot about portion size, healthy eating and how to cook and prepare a variety of foods but was unable to do this independently at home. She appeared very lonely and it was clear that she enjoyed the social interaction with others.
We suggested that mum attend the Cook & Eat sessions and a volunteer was assigned to the family to provide one to one support in the home. The volunteer started to build the relationship with mum which led to mum opening up about her own childhood. Mum stated that she would like to be a better parent and wanted her children to have a better childhood than she had experienced.
Mum confided that she could not cook and just did not know where to start. The volunteer began cooking with mum in the home with simple dishes at first. The volunteer supported mum with buying ingredients, preparing the meal, and eating as a family. Mum found the first attempt at cooking at home very difficult and stressful. She was unable to manage while the children were demanding her attention. She did not have a highchair for C1 and C2 was unaccustomed to siting at the table. The volunteer reassured mum that believing in herself and taking time to be consistent with the children would help. The volunteer and mum went to the local charity shop and purchased a highchair.
The volunteer continued to cook with mum and provide guidance and encouragement. The children were introduced to new taste and textures. Christmas saw a mum who did not have the education, confidence, or ability to cook simple meals, prepare a Christmas lunch for her and the children. She was so proud of her achievements. Mums confidence has improved, and she has started to believe in herself. Regular reviews of the family have seen a shy, emotional, unconfident mother change into a smiling young woman who sees hope for the future. The children have begun to present as happier children.